Determining a seating plan for your wedding reception can be one of the most difficult details you'll encounter in your wedding planning. In today's world of blended families, it can be easy to open a big can of worms just by seating someone in the wrong place. You may find that you have multiple issues to address when you begin determining where to seat each person. Here are some of the original rules for seating, and some ways to make seating guests at your reception just a bit easier.
The Head Table
Traditionally, the head table is a long, rectangular table, positioned at the head of the reception room, where all the other tables can see it. The bride and groom usually sit right in the middle. The maid of honor sits next to the groom and the best man next to the bride. Then the other attendants are seated out from the best man and maid of honor in a boy/girl fashion. Today, many couples are getting away from this traditional seating arrangement. Often, there is a small table for two for the bride and groom and a separate table for attendants. If you choose to seat your attendants at their own table(s), be sure to make it near the front of the room and the microphones if they'll be making toasts. Also, if you have children in your wedding, you should plan to seat them at the table with their parents rather than at the head table. It's not your maid of honor's job to babysit your five year old flower girl all night! Seating The Parents
Traditionally, the bride's parents and grandparents are seated at the same table with the groom's parents and grandparents. But, since many couples have divorced parents today, this arrangement is often unthinkable. If you or your groom has divorced parents that you believe would not be comfortable sitting together, consider one table for each set of parents/stepparents. Let your Mom and her husband sit with your grandparents on her side, and possibly your siblings. Then let your Dad and his wife have their own table, with his grandparents and siblings or other family members from his side. Alternatively, many people who come from divorced families choose to sit the parent that raised them, along with their spouse, at the same table with their partner's parents. The bottom line is that you have to do what works for your particular family situation, ensuring as best you can that everyone is comfortable. Other Tables
Many couples choose not to have a seating chart for guests these days. They simply ensure there is enough seating for every guest, and let people choose where they will sit. This is particularly common when the reception includes a buffet meal or hors d'oeuvres.
However, if you're serving a sit down dinner, it's wise to have a seating chart. Doing so allows the catering staff to know how many beefs at this table, and so on, before the guests are seated. Assigned seats will make the service at a sit down reception go more smoothly.
If you do choose to have a seating chart for every guest consider the following things: - Family members who don't get along. Rekindling an old feud is the last thing you want at your wedding reception.
- Seating old friends together so they can catch up. For instance, it might be great fun to seat all your college friends at a table together so they can get reacquainted.
- Singles - If you and your honey have lots of single friends, you might consider using your reception as a way to allow some of these singles to meet each other. Use your matchmaking skills to plan a seating chart that has potential to make someone as happy as you are!
- Wallflowers and lives of the party - When you're seating people who don't know each other at the same table, give some thought to the personality of each guest at the table. Each table needs at least one person who can be counted on to generate conversation and draw in the less gregarious guests. If you have a table filled with wallflowers, no conversation will get started and everyone at the table will be uncomfortable. On the other hand, if you seat all the loud people together, no one will get a word in edgewise.
- The heavy drinkers - I don't recommend seating these people at the front of the room where every single guest can witness their antics. If you've got a known loud party boy or girl, seating them as inconspicuously as possible may avoid embarrassment!
Get started on your seating chart early, as it's likely to take more time than you anticipated. It's often helpful to create a spreadsheet, so you can move names around as you need to make changes, and as you receive regrets from guests.
